Timebombs That Are Set to Go Off in Your Mind…How to Stop Them Now
One of the single most debilitating roadblocks on your journey to self-growth is fear. Fear is the little guy on your shoulder that tells you it is much safer to stay where you are, stagnant and on the road headed in the opposite direction as love. When we are in a state of fear, we are blocking out love and the possibilities of choosing a loving life. Fear is so debilitating that we tend to lose our capability to love. Choose love and not fear. The goal is always to return home. When I speak of home, I speak of love. When you have lost the ability to love and feel love, it becomes all about survival and fear. Survival is that fight or flight mentality which is not a healthy place to dwell. It is like living life through the reptilian brain, which is based on fear. The reptilian brain was the name a neuroscientist gave to the basal ganglia, structures derived from the floor of the forebrain during development. The term came from the idea that comparative neuroanatomists once believed that the forebrains of reptiles and birds were dominated by these structures. He proposed that this reptilian brain was responsible for typical species behaviors that involved aggression, dominance, territoriality, and ritual displays.
Recognizing Fear, Fight, and Flight Behavior
Having raised a green-cheeked conure for the twelve years since it is five months hatched, I somewhat understood this. I have learned much from observing my parrot, and understand the concept of how they are dominated by these structures. The reptilian brain keeps you in survival mode, where states of insecurity and anxiety, and fear fester. The problem arises when you stay stuck in survival mode as a state of being. You become locked in the reptilian brain and suddenly, everything seems like a threat to your survival, where there is always a problem to solve and danger to find. It reacts, and it reacts quite unconsciously. This is flight or fight behavior. I have witnessed this fear with my parrot. I have also witnessed this fear in myself during my unconscious years and in other unconscious people in my path.
Fear-Based Characteristics of the Reptilian Brain
- Power and Control
The characteristics of the reptilian brain range from territoriality, the hierarchical structure of power and control, ownership, jealousy, anger, hostility, anxiety, worry and fear, aggression, combativeness, and cold-bloodedness. Other characteristics range from obsessive-compulsive disorder, hoarding, stealing and deception, to fight or flight behavior. The reptilian brain will overpower one’s ability to have calm rational thought unless you come into conscious presence.
How to Re-wire
- Be present and tuned in
- Observe fear but don’t believe it
- Blow off the little liar on your shoulder
- Allow intuition to steer the wheel
- Embrace love
So how can we re-wire away from fear now? How do we stop fear from controlling our mind? By being present and tuned in. When we stop and observe the thinking mind and dis-identify with the thoughts and belief systems that have been embedded in there, we can disconnect from thought based fear, and begin to enter into an alert state of presence. Within this state of presence, you will have the ability to react differently. Observing my parrot was a great way to understand the concept of fight or flight behavior, and how much the reptilian brain is completely wrapped in fear. Looking back, there were times in my life when I could recognize where I personally made decisions based solely on my fear. This recognition became a life lesson where I can say with conviction, that I no longer allow fear to run my life. The love in my heart and the integrated connection I now have is powerful and divine. To live in this love is to blow the little liar off your shoulder every time. It allows innate to take over and intuition to steer the wheel. Your intuition will never let you down.
- Fear of Illness
When I observe pain, I notice that fear is a close second. And when you believe what fear is telling you, the emotional suffering begins. When we are given a body threatening diagnosis from the doctor, we suddenly sense fear. We are afraid of the suggested treatments and its side effects, and even more afraid of it not working. We fear that we will never experience life as we knew it and that it may even come to an end. We promise ourselves and God that we will do anything to get the life back that we identified with. Some people say they would do anything for the chance of a do-over. They promise to stop smoking, start eating healthy, to give up this or that, and to be kind to others. The sickness, which we will call pain, has suddenly become a wake-up call. If pain is warning us to wake up or else…then why do we fear it? If there is a fire in your house while you are asleep, and a random firefighter enters to wake and save you, do you fear the firefighter can’t save you, or do you embrace him with trust?
- Fear of Loss and Change
One day the market crashes and all that you had goes with it. The few things you have left begins to wither away as well, and suddenly you have a mental and emotional meltdown. How can this be? The loss, which we will call pain, of what you had and all that you identified yourself with, has put you in a state of fear as a result of the pain. Your life spins deeper into chaos as you begin to push the people who love you the most out of your path, and you become angry at the world for not cooperating. Let us suppose that while you were living with all of the money and feeling secure, that you were actually sitting in the dark holding your breath the whole time. You appeared satisfied there but were actually too frightened to move. It seemed that you felt safe there, but deep down you feared that one day…this would happen. Perhaps you even unconsciously manifested it. The little liar on your shoulder said, “I told you this would happen!” Is it possible to see this fear as a window shade, stopping the light from getting in? Can you see how fear runs your life?
- Pain is Not the Enemy
Remember, pain is not your enemy. Rather it is an opportunity for growth. If we fear our pain, we cannot address it. Be aware when you sense fear, but realize that fear is only an illusion that the thinking mind is telling you. Don’t believe it. It does not really exist. Only in your mind. It is the little liar on your shoulder. When you say no to fear, you can begin to address the pain. This is where the important internal work begins. This is where you should do a self-inquiry, and become aware of your pain. And in that awareness, there is an embrace…a holding on, where you know that it has come to you for a reason. Come to know your pain as something to love and embrace, not as something to be feared. And in that embrace, you will find your truth. In a way, pain can be a blessing because it can lead you to find your truth. It can be your passage into love and light. Remember that fear is the opposite of love. We cannot transform if we are living in fear. The only way to transformation is through love.
- Who Have You Not Forgiven?
Sometimes we will be on our way to an event or gathering, a family member’s home, a city or even a country, and suddenly we feel restless and uneasy. Perhaps you sense that you are a little nervous, or you have an unsettled heart that you cannot place your finger on. This is fear. This is the little liar on your shoulder. I find that this is another wonderful opportunity to look inward and do your internal work. If fear is the opposite of love, the first question you may ask yourself is who have I not forgiven? You will be amazed to see what unfolds within your own heart. It may be a friend, a family member, a situation or even a country that you have not forgiven. This is where you should simply and unequivocally forgive. Let it go. It has no influence on you now. If you do not release it, you will store it, and continue to suffer.
If love is absolute and fear is an illusion, why do we lose ourselves in illusion? If love is the infinite essence of who we are, why do we sometimes act out of fear and not love? We knew love all along, but have forgotten it because of all of the madness in this world of form. Our life situations obscured the remembrance of love. To the extent that we forget who we are, that piece of Divine Oneness in which we are all connected, we also forget love. And so we fall into this bottomless pit of pain. This pain brings us life-changing choices, however. We will either remember to love or act out unlovingly. When we act out unlovingly, it means we are still frightened. Chose love and not fear. The goal is always to return home. When I speak of home, I speak of love.
“We cannot transform if we are living in fear. The only way to transformation is through love.”
If you are currently experiencing fear in any area of your life, I urge you to pick up a copy of “Truth To Triumph” and read it. Use it as a guide for your return home to love.