Do you understand the facts about Domestic Violence and the reason why you or someone you know keep the silence of violence? Statistics show that the number of American troops killed in Afghanistan and Iraq between 2001-2012 are 6,488. The number of American women murdered in the US during that same time are 11,766. That’s nearly double the casualties lost in a war! Today, that number has risen. Additionally it has become prevalent in upscale households which is why many of these women keep there abuse a secret. Whose going to hear them screaming for their life on a three acre lot? Whose going to believe them when their husband/partner is a respected figure in the community? Statistics show that more than 3 woman every day in the US are murdered from either a current or ex spouse/male partner. Are these enough statistics to safely agree that Domestic Violence not only a crime but a violent epidemic?
For the abuser its all about power and control and he will stop at nothing to maintain that. The victim stays captive in the relationship for too long, for many reasons. All the reasons result from threats and coercion, intimidation, emotional abuse, physical abuse, using isolation, using economic abuse, using male privilege, minimizing, denying and blaming, and using the children! When being physically abused and battered, the victim must always chose to run for her life, and for their children’s life, and never ever look back. Even long after a victim flees, he will leave no stone upturned in attempts to try and make her suffer…just for the sole reason that she left him, and has lost his control over her. It is never about love. This may be a hard fact to absorb, but understand this; Love does not hurt, it is not jealous, it is not controlling, it is not violent, and it does not kill or attempt to kill! Statistics show that only 4% of batterers change. That’s 4 out of 100. Don’t gamble with this statistic. Commit to reclaiming and rebuilding your life.
Study the wheel and see where your relationship behind closed doors, mirrors any of these descriptions in each piece of the wheel. Bear in mind, that if you are a victim of DV, he may already have you thinking you’re crazy. You are not! Take your time and read all the parts. If even one part matches your current situation, address it. Violence is a crime. Don’t be a statistic. Break the silence, even if you think no one will believe you, or if you feel you won’t be protected. You may need to be on your toes at all times, but the authorities will work with you and protect you as long as you never waiver, and never ever entertain any third party communication between you and the batterer.
Wishing you all the happy, peaceful and loving life you deserve. If you or someone you know are in what I call, silence of violence, please share this blog, and my website to them. We all have the power to break the mold for generational blessings.
Live in love,
Lily Sanders
